It's Fun To Be Neurotic!

So this last Sunday I decided to have another one of my Dessert Extravaganzas.  Having learned from last year, I worked ahead and started making and freezing cakes about 2 weeks ago.  This means I was much less-bitchy on the actual day of the party; hence, Bee wasn't nearly as ready to divorce me.


New this year: Bee and I had a Cake-Off to determine whose chocolate cake recipe is the best.  Bee won.  But only by two votes.

Two tiny votes.

Pretty insignificant votes, at that.

Really, his win doesn't even count.

Of course, Bee is thrilled, and has already packaged up his leftover cake and labeled it "Bee's Award-Winning Cake-Off Chocolate Cake".

I am particularly proud of my laissez-faire attitude during the Dessert Extravaganza since I was a little preoccupied by Kindergarten goings-on.

The Parent-Teacher Organization's fundraising carnival is this Friday.  Trying to be Good and Involved Parents, Bee and I donated to the class auction basket and I've volunteered to help during set-up.  Since still none of the parents have been allowed in the Kindergarten classroom, I figured this was a good intro to activeness.

Late last Thursday afternoon, however, I received a personal e-mail from a PTO member saying, in part:

Each teacher is responsible for completing a class art project to be sold in the silent auction at the carnival.  [The kindergarten teacher] needs someone to come up with an idea and help complete the project in class---ideally, before next Wednesday.  All the teachers are starting with a barn wood picture frame that looks like a 4 paned window.  Your job would be to come up with the idea to go in the frame using the theme of the carnival—Distant Future.

Oh, boy, did I want to help: not only because this was exactly the type of in-class-help I've been dying to do before Mr. C's conception, but because I sensed I'd get to bitch about it a lot.

And I have:

1)  Wait a minute: this is to be done by 22 5-year-olds?
2)  During a school day that lasts approximately 2 hours?
3)  Within, basically, the next three (school) days?
4)  And what does "Distant Future" mean, anyway?
5)  And what are a bunch of 5-year-olds going to create that someone would really want to pay money for?
6)  And you want it done within three days?

Oh, it's been so fun to lament to anyone who'll listen about my creative challenge!

Someone in my writer's group pointed out that "Distant Future" to a Kindergartner is anything after lunch.  Which I thought was brilliant, because it

1) lowers the bar and
2) allows me to do a night-theme: specifically, Van Gogh's "Starry Night", which is one of my favorite paintings.


So I figured we'd do macaroni-paint-by-numbers, meaning the kids would glue colored noodles to a backdrop I'd painted:

(I'm kind of regretting the red)

I figured the noodles keep the project "young", while the subject-matter still appeals to adults.

So I spent today in the classroom.  Oh, you should have seen the looks of bewilderment and jealousy on the faces of the other mothers as I smugly sashayed past them and into the classroom this morning!  Ah, sometimes life is SOOO worth living!

I worked with 5 groups of 4 kids to glue on the noodles I'd painted last night (FYI: put the macaroni in a Ziploc, drizzle with acrylic paint, seal and shake.  Then, for good measure, place the highly-flammable painted noodles in a low-temp oven on waxed paper-lined cookie sheets to dry for a bit.)

The ratio of small picture size - to class size - to day-length actually ended up working well, as the kids lost interest after about 15 minutes anyway, allowing the next group to easily move in and the entire project to be complete in about an hour-and-a-half.

Then I had each kid sign the barn wood picture frame (which -- I just couldn't help it -- I'd spray-painted silver).

All I have left to do now is write up some crap for the back of the frame that makes all of this make sense.  I was thinking:

Distant Future
To a young child, the whole world is the future.
To the world, the future is that young child.

Thoughts?  (By tomorrow, mind you; I'm on a deadline, here!)

Anyway, I think the class did very well:

although Van Gogh may disagree